Antimonkey is a web humor outlet. Simple, no? We used to go by “Monkeys With Typewriters,” until Blind Monkey realized that the name was taken by ten or so other websites. Our stars are:
Horace sober, Juvenal drunk.
Role: Founder, Head Writer, Amateur Cardiologist
Bio: Blind Monkey is a part-time satirist and full time megalomaniac. He writes essays, fiction, and pornographic bathroom graffiti. He studied “liking books” at Princeton, and now studies “writing books” at Columbia.
Lived up to his full potential yesterday.
Role: Writer, Bad Influence, Future Watchlist Star
Bio: The second writer to join the team, Mute Monkey is an expert at pretending to be an expert. A survivor of Purchase College’s Department of Literature, where he studied the skills essential to his future purge of half the media.
Role: Audio Engineer, Writer, Herald of the Old Ones
Bio: Deaf Monkey turns the incomprehensible series of screams and demonic laughter sent to him by Blind Monkey into semi-coherent content. He also writes an article about once a year. Twice in the year of the rabbit.
Contact: Smoke signals.
Burn the old layout. Shoot the designer. Leave nothing behind.
Role: Designer, Sandwich Critic
Bio: Ape’s critical eye pushed Antimonkey out of the early nineties’ web design standards, and the early nineteenth century’s branding conventions. He can also use the word “branding” without sounding like an idiot.
Contact: Break the 7th seal on the eve of all saints day.